Weekly Updates

I have struck upon an idea; perhaps this site would better serve my readers if I were to update it at regular intervals. People would know when to come and check for the latest catatostrophe forecast.

I have selected the stroke of midnight on Sunday nights, for it is quite clear to me that the Apocalypse will come on a Monday morning; probably in February. People will get up and find that it has snowed while they were sleeping. "Oh that's just typical. Fucking Mondays," will be the resounding cry. Everyone will shovel the snow off their cars and then go get stuck in traffic. And so the chorus shall echo, "Oh that's just typical. Fucking Mondays." Then the city will be torn apart by gigantic, stone-skinned demons. "Now that's atypical," the people will say, "Fucking Mondays." And then they will all be roasted alive inside their vehicles, wishing fervently that just this once they had slept in instead of going to work.

So, let it be known that each and every Sunday evening I shall release upon the world another Sign of the Apocalypse.

Matthew has begged to be allowed to type something with his clumsy ape-fingers. I have decided to humour him, but I presume that it's not worth reading, so please, go about your business.

[Ed. note -- Look, no need to insult me, I just wanted to say that the timing was good, because people will be able to go and check their sbemail to cheer themselves up after all the doom and gloom.]